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Okay, this is for my creative writing class. Forgive the excessive length, because I forgot how to do those cuts on my own. The little web command paper is on my desk, at home, and I am in Oklahoma, trying to get my make-up work done. Please forgive the stupidity of this story, too--I'm just trying to get it done. So, here it is:

The Three Billy Goats Buff

Once upon a time, there were three billy Goats. The first billy goat was rather young, but he was strong for his age. The second billy goat was a reasonably-good sized teenage billy goat who all the younger billy goat girls wanted to date. The third billy goat was a strong, muscular billy goat who had the respect and admiration of all the billy goats...NOBODY messed with the biggest billy goat buff. These three goats were brothers, and though their busy lives didn't let them spend very much time together during the day, every evening they met at the candy store across the river to buy and eat the sweet, sweet Snickers bars.

Well, one day the first billy goat buff was walking to the candy store when an ugly lab scientist jumped onto the bridge and said "Who's that clopping on this bridge? Oh! A billy goat! You would make the perfect specimen to use in my next experiment!"

A bit nervous, the young billy goat managed to stammer, "Oh no, sir! You don't want me as a lab animal! I'm too small and scrawny! I wouldn't last through any science experiments! Take my older brother! He's coming soon. He's much bigger and stronger and would surely be a better specimen for your experiment."

The scientist thought and thought, and finally, he reluctantly said, "Oh, very well. I'll let you pass. But your next brother won't be so lucky!"

Quickly, the first billy goat buff ran across the bridge and waited inside the safety of the candy shop for his other brothers to arrive.

Next, the second billy goat gruff began bicycling across the bridge, on his way to the candy store to meet his brothers. Suddenly, his path was cut off by the ugly lab scientist, who jumped up onto the bridge again and grabbed the bike by the handlebars.

"What's this driving by on this bridge! Why it's the second billy goat buff! You can ride a bike? How clever! Your little brother was right; you would make a MUCH better specimen for my experiment! I can even do brain scans on you!"

However, not to be outwitted, the second billy goat said smoothly, "Oh, surely you wouldn't want to study someone lacking as many motor skills as I do, Mr. Scientist. You should seriously stay here and wait for my brother. He's much bigger, much stronger, and much smarter than I. Considering he has all these qualities, I'm certain he would make a much better specimen for your experiment than I could."

The scientist thought and thought. He didn't want to lose this wonderful specimen, but the prospect of an even smarter billy goat to study was even more exciting. Finally, he asked hesitantly, "Are you sure he'll come by on this bridge?

"Oh, yes, yes!" replied the second billy goat buff.

"And you're sure he'll be smarter?

"Oh, yes, yes!" he promised.

"Well..." the scientist contemplated. "Okay. But your next brother won't be so lucky!"

Satisfied, the second billy goat buff biked leisurely to the candy store, where he parked his bike and entered the store to meet his brothers.

At last, the third billy goat buff began to drive his semi-truck across the bridge. The scientist jumped up on the bridge to see if it was the third billy goat gruff, but upon looking at the semi-truck, he stopped. "Oh, crap! I'm not messing with that guy!" he muttered. However, at that moment, the semi-truck stopped.

Trembling, the scientist watched as the huge, muscular, third billy goat gruff stepped out of the semi-truck and approached him, towering over the scientist. "I heard you've been bothering my brothers!" he grumbled.

"Now, where would you ever get an idea like that?" the scientist stammered.

"They called me on my cell. You better not mess with my brothers again, do you hear me?" he demanded. "I have some pretty strong contacts with a couple of animal rights activists and a couple of buddies as strong as me who can mess you up real bad."

"Y-y-yes sir," the scientist stammered, stepping out of the way. The third billy goat gruff climbed back into the semi-truck and joined his brothers at the candy shop. There, the three billy goats gruff ate Snickers bars together, then joined the animal rights activists at their rally downtown. They never saw the scientist again.
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[User Picture]
On December 10th, 2005 04:33 am (UTC), thefragyle commented:
lol nice. it's fluffy, but it made me smile.

and, to do a cut:

<*lj-cut text="whatever you want the link to say"> blah blah blah cut text <*/*lj-cut*>

except without the *'s. and with your own words for the link and what's cut.

don't worry. eventually you will be as lj-addicted as me and will be able to rattle off these codes like your spanish words.
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